yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
