just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
I lost my flask somewhere between dancing shirtless to The Spice Girls and walking around Wawa opening/eating things and putting them back.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
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