its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
Apparently campus cops frown on lighting a joint off of the eternal flame on Jerry Falwell's grave...
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
Apparently I drunkenly agreed to help the homeless. For once, I'm not disappointed in drunk me. Four for you, drunk self. You go, drunk self!
Just stopped at a cross walk because the light turned red 3 streets down. I'm way too high.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
