It has come to my attention that I should apologize for myself and my friends
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
used foursquare to find where i am. please come get me. this is the scariest bedroom ever.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
