Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
We were making fun of some people having sex on the beach, an hour later we were having sex on a golf course
Randomize
