So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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