I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
i have a new found respect for you. the amount of people you must have cockblocked last night is amazing
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
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