i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
You would not believe how incredibly hard it is to climb on top of a three story apartment buildings roof from the air conditioning unit
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Brunch got away from me. I might be a little high.
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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