Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I feel like passing out with my foot on your face has bonded us at a very fundamental level.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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