even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
I don't even know what beauty is right now. I wouldn't even pity fuck me today.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
So I may have to sleep with a cougar to get a slightly used, yet free microwave. I'm going in
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
To be fair I went my whole first week without showing up to work drunk!
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
