Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I just told a kid I was in a wheelchair because Santa shot me due to me being on the naughty list. You should have seen this little bastards face
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Randomize
