you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
