He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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