I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
