"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
she peed on how many people?
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Oh I fucked him, definitely. We played Strip Halo.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
