lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
id be glad to
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
Randomize
