I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
I supernannyed him into submission
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Randomize
