doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
My entire summer has consisted of being too drunk for this shit, too sober for this shit, or too hungover for this shit.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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