...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
i just wanna soil my oats bro
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
