I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I'm covered in mustard and it looks like I nose dived in to barbed wire ??? Was last night that good?
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Does your balding hurt less when a 19 year old holds your hand?
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
