Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
you do realize that we pretended we were worms for like 10 minutes and inched around on the ground, don't you?
the whole "pretend to be sober/pull it together for my family" thing really blew up in my face when i threw up into my pillowcase.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
