awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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