It took him longer to undo my bra than he lasted..
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Dude if our hands were ladels we could work at a soup kitchen
That would be so convenient
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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