I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I would fuck him just for his dog
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
