never play flip cup with pint glasses
Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Randomize
