Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize