Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
