so explain again why im purple
no
Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Redeem this text for a blowjob
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
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