She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
Your mouth is God's brothel.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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