my professor just told me i smelt like a brewery infront of my whole class b4 my final presentation
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I have a feeling that watching gay porn with you was the reason I was dancing in a hurricane of floating dicks in my dream last night.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
Randomize