Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
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