This girl told me I had the balls of an infant..I replied by saying her vagina looks like Stargate.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
i don't remember it, but i know we had sex because my stuffed animals were facing the wall
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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