OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
Just remembered that I got laid thanks to my glow in the dark Batman belt buckle. Need to wear it more often.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize
