I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
