this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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