Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
Randomize