I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
do you think if she looks enough like a dude i have to come out to my parents?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
