..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
