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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
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