So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
Randomize