is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
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