I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
Our house drank 90 beers yesterday afternoon before 8pm so add that to the list
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
