glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
no, he came in my armpit
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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