talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
