god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
Did he think I was flirting with him when I ordered a hot dog bc no
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
