i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
out of nowhere you said let us see your boobs, then proceeded to pull my shirt down.
i gets down
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Ask her if it hurt when she broke through earths crust as she ascended from hell
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
