you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
As an added realisation of today. If we used the last time I got laid as a conceiving date I would have a two week old baby. It's been too long...
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
