I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
.......he just venmo charged me for the burrito I was eating while he broke up with me
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
