Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
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