Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
